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"The social construct of Gender is explored and deconstructed innovatively through an impeccable visual landscape, evocative sound design, the limitations of language, and a touching personal story, all combining to create an immersive world of breaking free."
- Jury at the Seattle Queer Film Festival, 2020
A short essay film attempting to formally combine day-to-day props and itineraries in Beirut. These elements, whether formally gendered or transformed into something that is, all become part of a personal narrative where I am made aware of my gender. This experiment challenges the notion of the binary as I navigate through the city as both male, female, and neither.
For this thesis project, I explored the usage of mixed practices and media including a written dissertation prior to the production of the film, storyboarding, gathering data, film and photography, various forms of animation including motion graphics, 3D, stop-motion.
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Specs:
Specs:
Project type: Experimental, essay, student, short
Runtime: ~10 minutes
Language: Arabic (Fr/En Subtitles)
Aspect Ratio: 16:9
2019
Statement
The street behind my apartment building shares its facing sidewalks with clustered hardware stores, coffee kiosks, and motor-cycles. Mothers hold the hands of their children during the day and men smoke hookah pipes by their shops at night. In need of electronic supplies, I once made my way to one of these stores only familiar to me by sight. Two men by the counter took their time to help me find what I needed, and, later throughout our exchange of dialogue, they asked me “Shou Esmak Lzghir?” (What is your name? -addressed to a man-).
My baggy sweatpants and binded chest did not allow their eyes to pick-up on any missing or present bulge that would indicate my sex. Instead, the vendors focused on my appearance, my posture, the fact that I was unaccompanied at night in a hardware store, and completely disregarded the pitch of my voice. They therefore believed I was a man. Without hesitating I firmly answered,“Mohamad”, the name of my dad.
I continued to be greeted as one of the “boys” from the area, and, as I carefully accessed this man cave and shared new body language with others, it felt like trespassing. I had to keep up with this act without allowing them to realize that something was not right. That the gender they saw me as was not in fact aligned with what they believed was in my pants. But that did not happen. I kept embodying what was closest to my understanding of a heteronormative man, and in that moment, I was, in fact, a man.
I continued to be greeted as one of the “boys” from the area, and, as I carefully accessed this man cave and shared new body language with others, it felt like trespassing. I had to keep up with this act without allowing them to realize that something was not right. That the gender they saw me as was not in fact aligned with what they believed was in my pants. But that did not happen. I kept embodying what was closest to my understanding of a heteronormative man, and in that moment, I was, in fact, a man.
Screenings
éation Trans
Lyon, France
October 29, 2023
Lyon, France
October 29, 2023
Les Mains Gauches
Marseille, France
September 7+8, 2023
Marseille, France
September 7+8, 2023
Kassel Documentary Film and Video Festival - Kasseler Dokfest
Kassel, Germany
November 15, 2022
Kassel, Germany
November 15, 2022
Berlin Pride / Mobile Kino x Christopher Street Day
Berlin, Germany
July 13, 2022
Berlin, Germany
July 13, 2022
XPOSED Queer Film Festival
Berlin, Germany
May 26+27, 2022
Berlin, Germany
May 26+27, 2022
Amsterdam, Netherlands
October 28, 2021
October 28, 2021
Berlin, Germany
October 21, 2021
October 21, 2021
AIWA! A tribute to Sarah Hegazi
Brussels, Belgium
June 25, 2021
Brussels, Belgium
June 25, 2021
Alaska Airlines in-flight entertainment
USA, Canada, Mexico
March-December 2021
USA, Canada, Mexico
March-December 2021
Image+Nation LGBTQeer Montréal Film Festival
Montréal, Canada
December 9, 2020
Canadian Premiere
Montréal, Canada
December 9, 2020
Canadian Premiere
Seattle Queer Film Festival
Seattle, USA
October 15, 2020
Most Innovative Short Jury Award
Seattle, USA
October 15, 2020
Most Innovative Short Jury Award
Wicked Queer LGBTQ+ Film Festival
Boston, USA
July 26, 2020
USA Premiere
Boston, USA
July 26, 2020
USA Premiere
Fundraiser for Lebanon at HWK
London, UK
January 31, 2020
London, UK
January 31, 2020
Beirut Animated Film Festival
Beirut, Lebanon
October 31, 2019 (Cancelled)
Tosh Fesh Awards Official Selection
Beirut, Lebanon
October 31, 2019 (Cancelled)
Tosh Fesh Awards Official Selection
Nedwa Conference by the Arab Foundation for Freedoms and Equality
Nicosia, Cyprus
September 28, 2019
Nicosia, Cyprus
September 28, 2019
MENA-logue, Gender Beyond Boundaries Exhibition
Milan, Italy
July 20, 2019
European Premiere
Milan, Italy
July 20, 2019
European Premiere
Mise en Abyme Film Festival
Beirut and Byblos, Lebanon
June 20, 2019 and July 28, 2019
Beirut and Byblos, Lebanon
June 20, 2019 and July 28, 2019
American University of Beirut (Final Year Thesis Project)
Beirut, Lebanon
May 14, 2019
First Prize Areen Award + Dean's Award for Creative Achievement
Beirut, Lebanon
May 14, 2019
First Prize Areen Award + Dean's Award for Creative Achievement
Vices and Validations Exhibition (Work in Progress Screening)
Beirut, Lebanon
May 2, 2019
Beirut, Lebanon
May 2, 2019
Behind the Scenes compilation
Project Type: Experimental, Short Film, Essay Film
Run Time: 10 minutes
Completion Date: May 13, 2019
Project Budget: 0 USD
Country of Origin: Lebanon
Run Time: 10 minutes
Completion Date: May 13, 2019
Project Budget: 0 USD
Country of Origin: Lebanon
Language: Arabic (En/Fr Subtitles)
Soundtrack: Roger Zouein
Advisors: Omar Mismar, Hatem Imam
Support and Assistance: Layane Boustany El Hajjar
Honorable Mentions: Lynn, Omar, Sara, Sam, Steph, Whard, Studio Safar, Haven for Artists, Barbero
Soundtrack: Roger Zouein
Advisors: Omar Mismar, Hatem Imam
Support and Assistance: Layane Boustany El Hajjar
Honorable Mentions: Lynn, Omar, Sara, Sam, Steph, Whard, Studio Safar, Haven for Artists, Barbero
For privacy reasons, kindly request access first
Thank you.
